Can I Touch Your Hair?

 

Can I Touch Your Hair?

I have always been caught in the middle when it came to the subject of touching my hair.

Now, if it’s another natural asking to touch it then I will gracefully bow down and rub my fro in your face, lol.

But, if it is a non natural then it would really be like Russian roulette to ask me such a question. There would be so many factors to consider before answering that question.

·         First, will allowing you to touch my hair ruin anything that my hair is currently doing?

·         Am I sober? (you have better chances if I’m not)

·         Do you look like you will say something that will piss me off?

·         Do I look like a petting zoo?

I mean really, the list can go on for days.

But, recently, one of my natural hair muses, Taren Guy, stood in Union Square with a group of other natural women holding signs that read "You can touch my hair." This campaign was done with the intentions of starting conversations that would allow them to educate others about natural hair, about the concept of good hair vs. bad hair and about the taboo behind a nice big fro.

This campaign was not met without opposition. There was also a group of naturals with signs that read "You cannot touch my hair" and other more colorful statements. These girls argued that it is not our job to educate others about our hair and we should not degrade ourselves to a petting zoo in order to help others understand us.

I can understand why these women feel this way, but how can we promote change without education.

I think this campaign has had a definite effect on the way that I will handle this question when approached in the future. This is not to say that my fro will become open for business, but I will be less discriminating about whom I allow to cop a feel.

What is your opinion? Should we be more open to the afro illiterate?

Wicked Wednesday

Wicked Wednesday

In honor of Monday’s post about teaching our children to love themselves, this week’s Wicked Wednesday installment will feature the curly kiddies!

Enjoy!

Don't foget you can always submit your photos to be included in Wicked Wednesday by sending them to spokenheart_mf@aol.com!

Keep Your Afros at Home

Keep Your Afros at Home

Recently, a viewer and friend shared an article with me that left me feeling very confused. Natural hair and childhood is a subject that I am very passionate about.

I wasn’t allowed to get my first relaxer until the age of 13 and I was mad about it. But, I am very grateful for this now. I feel like this allowed me to enjoy being a child, I wasn’t allowed to wear weaves or too many elaborate hairdos because I was expected to be, act and appear as a child. This granted me the ability to escape vanity for a little while longer. I also feel like it helped me to learn to love myself without any additives.

I have spoken to many people before about how important it is for our little girls to love themselves as they come. As time passes, we will all be subject to the pressures of vanity but childhood is not the time to start.

We should be teaching our little girls to love their hair as it grows and their skin in its different shades. As oppose to burning the black off their scalp or hiding it beneath weaves. I am not saying that this will prevent them from ever getting a relaxer or even from becoming a high maintenance pinup doll. I can’t even pretend that I have fully escaped my hair prison. I am still sometimes wondering if my hair looks nice or professional enough, I am still getting questioned by friends as to what is a professional enough hairdo to wear to work. I still know naturals that wear weaves to work instead of their hair as to not offend anyone.

But, I do firmly believe it will help them appreciate themselves more and do less searching for that appreciation in others. And it will definitely help with this epidemic of young girls looking like grown women.

Below is a portion of the letter sent to parents highlighting the new dress code changes at Horizon Science Academy in Ohio.

Afro-puffs and small twisted braids, with our [sic] without rubberbands, are NOT permitted.”

But, I digress. This article left me mouth agape and teeth grinding. I understand that the ban has been lifted and this is supposed to reverse the damage. But, the fact that they had the nerve to make this ban in the first place is the very reason that we must allow our little girls to learn to love themselves as they come. Although it may not be an outright hate statement, this is all but a hate crime. This is a blatant example of how people of color are taught to hate themselves. It is a subliminal message to our little girls that their hair as it grows out of their scalp is so unacceptable that it is a violation of dress code to wear it to school.

They banned afro puffs, but they did not ban pig tails. So you can send your daughter to school with her hair in ponytails as long as they lay down and not stand up, like ours naturally does. This is so laugh to me, or should I say all I can do is laugh at this.

But, in some ways, I also find this encouraging. Maybe it means that we are doing a better job at turning our children against themselves, doing a better job at loving ourselves and it is becoming a threat.

Whatever the reason, please remember that this starts at home. We can blame the schools and the society as much as we want. But, if we are doing this to our own children then we have no room to complain.

What are your thoughts on children and relaxers/weaves/appearance?

 

Organix Product Review

Organix Product Review

Anybody that knows me knows that I am an Organix product junkie!

I have even gone so far as to call as to call the Coconut Milk line my hair soul mate.

Today I will be reviewing this amazing product line based on the experiences that I have had with the different products that I have tried.

Coconut Milk

Website description: Coconut milk and ultra whipped egg white proteins along with weightless coconut oil to hydrate and nourish your hair as gentle cleansers wash away impurities.

ShampooI really enjoyed this shampoo. This is definitely my favorite of the different lines that I have tried from Organix. I enjoyed the sudsiness of this shampoo and the amazing smell. It left my hair feeling clean but not stripped.

Conditioner

Once again, this is definitely my favorite conditioner that I have used thus far. It left my hair feeling soft and well moisturized. I honestly do not have any downfalls to using these shampoos and conditioners.

Anti Breakage Serum
 I thoroughly enjoyed the anti breakage serum. It made my hair feel very smooth and look very shiny. The only problem is that it is a little thick so it is not easy to transfer all from your hands to your hair.

Weightless Styling Mousse
This is probably the only product from the Coconut Milk line that I did not enjoy. This left my hair feeling a little stringy.

Brazilian Keratin Therapy

Website description: Transform your hair into silky smooth locks with this exclusive blend of coconut oils, keratin proteins, avocado oil and cocoa butter.

ShampooI did not enjoy this shampoo very much at all. I assumed that with this nice blend of ingredients that this would be to die for, I know I should have known that it wasn’t going to be the best due to it being for Keratin Therapy. But, I do recommend for anyone that does use the Keratin in their hair.

Conditioner
I did find this conditioner to be useful in helping with shrinkage. I do not like to use it alone, but I typically mix it with some of my Coconut Milk conditioner and it really helps with stretching my hair and leaves it feeling great!

Macadamia Oil

Website description: Drench your strands in an ultra-moisturizing luxurious formula infused with nutrient rich macadamia oil to instantly hydrate and smooth parched, dry hair while exotic sugar cane extract and bamboo extract soften and mend split ends for a luscious, vibrant mane with brilliant shine

Sn: You know you natural when you receive hair products in your stocking. (that is how I met Macadamia Oil from Organix)

ShampooI enjoyed this product almost as much as I enjoyed the Coconut Milk line. I definitely found all of the benefits it boasted in the description to be true. It left my hair smelling and feeling great.

Conditioner
The conditioner was just as wonderful, if not better, than the shampoo.

Biotin & Collagen

Website description: A high performance blend of powerful ProVitamin B7 biotin infuses nutrients into every strand, while plumping collagen adds volume and dimension, and hydrolyzed wheat proteins strengthen, for thicker, fuller, healthier looking hair

ShampooThis had to be the most disappointing product that I have tried from this line. I was looking for something to strengthen my hair and after a bad experience with taking biotin pills; I figured that this shampoo would be the perfect alternative. It left my hair feeling stripped and maybe even weaker than before I used it.

ConditionerI also did not enjoy my experience with this conditioner. Although it smells heavenly, it left my hair feeling stringy and tangled. This quickly became shaving cream.

Please note, that depending on your hair type, you may love some of the products that I did not enjoy. I did try the Teatree Mint shampoo and conditioner once, from a friend, but not enough times to write a fair review.

These products are a bit expensive, in my opinion, but typically you can catch them on sale somewhere. Walmart, Walgreens and CVS typically take turns with either buy on get one or 5.99 each. But, since these are pratically the only products that I use in my hair anymore, I think they are defnitely worth it.

My hair does not respond well to argan oil so despite how bad I wanted to try their argan products, I declined. But, if you have tried them or any of the other lines that I haven’t gotten my hands on, feel free to share your experience with us. Or if you have tried any of these and gotten a different result, then please share that as well!

Secret Life of the Bobby Pin

Secret Life of the Bobby Pin

As, we all know, bobby pins are a natural’s best friend. They are basically the cornerstone for every hairstyle that we create.

Not so very long ago, a friend of mine tagged me in a picture on Facebook that displayed the proper way to use a bobby pin. (displayed on the left.)

I immediately went into denial and/or conspiracy theory mode. I even thought someone made the picture to see how many people would fall for it and change the way they use their bobby pins. I know; crazy!

Anyway, I finally left my state of denial after buying a pack of curved bobby pins and finding that the curve was facing the side that I usually placed outward (displayed on the right) confirmed that my theories were all incorrect.

It turns out that the grooved side is supposed to be facing your scalp. The grooves were made to grasp the hair and secure it into place. While the flat side of it actually helps to move the hair into the grooves of the bobby pin.

Also, did you know why there are called bobby pins? In the 20’s women use to wear their hair in a style referred to as “bobbed” which basically looks like French waves but hanging, and the bobby pins were used to hold this style in place.

Here are a few other tips for your future bobby pin use:

·         Bobby pins are fairly inexpensive but still; do not skim on cost when picking your bobby pins.

·         Try your best to pick bobby pins that compliment your hair color, unless of course you are using them as an accessory.

·         Crossing the bobby pins can create a stronger hold.

·         They say that using your teeth to open the bobby pin compromises the integrity of the bobby pin, opening the bobby pin causes it to become loose. They are meant to just sliiiide into your hair. (I don’t know if I can get with this rule lol)

Well, this has been the secret life of the bobby pin exposed, I hope I wasn’t the only one still doing this wrong.

A Day in the Curls of Roseiby

A Day in the Curls of Roseiby

Q: To begin with, have you ever had a relaxer?

A: When I was younger my mother would take me to get it done but it’s been a while since I did it; I would say since 2001 when I was 14.

Q: At what age did you start getting relaxers?

A: I don’t remember, I really don’t and I don’t want to be inaccurate.

Q: Why did you make the decision to stop getting relaxers?

A: It was when I was older, and at the time I just did whatever I wanted to my hair. It was always my mom’s idea to get them. At that time I didn’t mind getting them because, honestly, I hated my hair. The kids at school would call me a Chia Pet when I was younger so, I felt so much better having straight hair I remember doing it once after moving to Florida. But, when I was old enough to start doing my own thing, I did.

Q: So, it sound like you did not like getting relaxers. How did you mom feel about your decision to no longer relax your hair?

A: My mom didn’t really care like, she wasn’t mad. I had heard that relaxers were bad for my hair so I didn’t want to do it anymore and people were always telling me I had "good hair" so I didn’t feel like I needed to do it anyway.

Q: Would you say that the decision to no longer relax your hair affected your attitude or view towards yourself or others in anyway? Or were you too young then for it to really effect you?

A: I just wanted to have long hair so when I heard that relaxers were "bad" I just stopped. But, after I stopped relaxing my hair I just wore it in a pony and didn’t really take care of it or even wore it in a poof for a long time.

Q: What about now? Do you feel that you have learned to manage your natural hair better as time went on?

A: I’m still learning. I kind of walked into my poofiness by accident. One time I washed it and didn’t do anything to it, just wore it down, and I got so many compliments on my curls! I would say this was around 2005/6ish so ever since then I just been wearing it like I wear it now; pretty much get up & go. It wasn’t until lately after talking to you and other naturalistas that I learned  about hair products that would help my puff become even greater so, I’m still learning and my poof is still a work in progress.

Q: Do you miss relaxers or do you think that you will ever go back to relaxers?

A: Hell to the nah, I will never go back to relaxers again! I don’t even trust keratin treatments, which have been suggested to me so many times.

Q: If you have a daughter, do you think that you will relax her hair?

A: NO, lol.  My friend asked me that the other day, I want my baby to have healthy hair and if it’s not curly like mine, I’ll just find other ways to take care of it. I really just don’t believe in relaxers anymore.

(Roseiby's imaginary daughter, lol)

Q: What is your favorite product to use in your hair?

A: I just recently bought a Shea Moisture Curl Smoothie for my hair which is really awesome and makes my hair smell really good.

Q: What is your signature hair style?

A: I like wearing my hair with a side part and creating like a side bang.

Q: What is your favorite thing about your hair now?

A: I love how it always sticks out, no matter where I go and it’s so soft.

Q: What is your guilty hair pleasure (something you do to your hair even though you know it is not necessarily good fort it)?

A: Sometimes, I flat iron it when I want to take a break from the curl world.

Q: What advice would you give little curlies who are insecure about their curls due to bullying?

A: I would say they’re just jealous. Not everyone is blessed to have crazy beautiful hair so embrace it! It used to hurt my feelings when the kids at school called me a Chia Pet, now I’ll take that and be proud! My big hair is definitely something I’m proud of & I hope to make it even bigger....take that Chia Pet!

Would you like to share your curl journey? Contact me at spokenheart_mf@aol.com and share your natural pride with the world!

 

Wicked Wednesday

Wicked Wednesday

It’s that time of the week again, where we celebrate all things beautiful and natural!

Wedddnnnesssdaaaay!

Ayesha in her vanity mirror looking pretty amazing!

 

Hair Porn

Fiona out and about working her protective style!

Hair Porn

Anomaly with her TWA, making eyes at her husband!

Hair Porn

Hope you enjoyed this week's edition of Wicked Wednesday!

I look forward to posting your pics out on the town rocking your natural do's!

Send all submissions to spokenheart_mf@aol.com, we always need more to keep Wicked Wednesdays wicked!

Quick Protective Style

Quick Protective Style

I am a twist out junkie. Since I colored my hair recently, I realized that I need to start doing more protective styles. I also need to do more protective styles because I have so much hair and am unable to commit to twisting or plaiting my hair every night and I am not ready for another split ends big chop, I’d probably just cut it all off again (which I am considering). But, since I must protect my tresses until their demise, I decided to try a new protective style. It was really simple and quick, I did it in about 15-20 minutes.

What you will need: wide tooth comb or afro pic, rat-tail comb, brush, gel(optional), bobby pin, hairband, marley hair (optional)

Step 1

Part hair into 3 sections, two sections in the front half of your head and 1 section in the back and secure each section separately.

Step 2

Twist each of the sections into a flat twists and secure with bobby pins (or rubber bands, but I prefer not to use rubber bands).

Step 3

Pull all of the hair together into a single ponytail in the middle of the three flat twists.

Step 4

This step is optional, depending on the length of your hair and the desired fullness of your bun. I personally don’t have quite enough hair yet to make a nice full bun, so I used Marley hair. I took a pack of Marley hair and separated it into 2 sections. I twisted each section of the hair and secured the middle of the twist to my ponytail. I then wrapped it around my ponytail and secured it with bobby pins and repeated it with the other half of the hair.

For "Giants & Elephants" I added another twist of hair for a fuller more elegant look.

What is your go to protective style?

Long Hair, Does Care: From the Inside

Long Hair, Does Care:

From the inside

Most naturals dream of having a huge afro and twist out that race to the ground. I dream of having the world’s longest afro one day, but retaining this length is not easy. On average our hair grows about 1/2" per month, thats about 6" per year.

 When I was growing up, I was led to believe that black women just could not grow long hair, and based on what I saw as a child it was something I held to be true. I was under the impression that the only reason my hair was even kind of long was because I wasn’t fully black. In fact, it wasn’t until high school that I realized this wasn’t true.

Now as naturals, it is harder than ever to debunk this myth. Not only due to the fact that no matter how long our hair grows, it always shrinks back up to our foreheads and kills our dreams.  But, also due to the fact that we must work even harder to take care of our hair and making sure it is getting all the proper nutrients and moisture that it needs to remain healthy.

This is care that we must make sure we are taking from both the inside of our bodies and the outside. First, I will be discussing the things we must do from the inside to ensure hair health and promote growth.

·         The primary composition of your hair is keratin which is a protein that is formed with amino acids. To grow new hair, we must produce amino acids by consuming protein. A few ways that we can ensure that we are consuming healthy protein is by incorporating the following foods into our diets:  lean meat, fish, eggs, nuts, beans, and soy products.

·         Other nutrients that are needed for both healthy hair and bodies are iron and zinc. Iron and zinc deficits can cause both anemia and poor hair. 

o   In order to transmit oxygen to our cells and help our body build protein we must have sufficient iron. Good sources of iron to incorporate into your diet include: leans meats, poultry, eggs, beans, lentils, tofu and soybeans.

o   Zinc works to repair tissue and keep oil glands working as they should. Good sources of Zinc include: peanut butter, lean meat, oyster, crabs, poultry, pumpkin seeds, chickpeas or fortified grain products.

·         This one may be hard, but don’t be afraid of fat. We need healthy fats to promote hair growth. Fats help absorb Vitamins A, D, E and K. It is important to limit fat intake and primarily intake unsaturated fats and fatty acids like Omega 3.

·         A lack of sufficient Vitamin C in your diet can lead to dry, weak, dull hair that is more vulnerable to breakage. Vitamin C builds collagen which assist in producing new hair cells. Another process that Vitamin C assists with is the absorption of iron. You can get your Vitamin C from sources such as: citrus fruits, pineapples, strawberries, guava, broccoli, kale and peppers.

·         Another vitamin that supports healthy hair and growth is Vitamin B. While there is no scientific proof that shows that taking Vitamin B supplements such as riboflavin or biotin will make hair grow, there is evidence to support that a lack Vitamin B can cause hair loss and hair thinning. Sources of natural Vitamin B include: seafood, spinach, oatmeal, whole grains, soybean products, lean dairy, lean meats, bananas, lentils, potatoes, peas, beets, broccoli and artichokes.

So, in order to have long healthy hair, we must take care of our bodies. Consuming these foods and vitamins will not only benefit our hair health but will also improve our overall health!