Showing posts with label bad advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bad advice. Show all posts

Monday, September 16, 2013

Habitual Offender

Habitual Offender

On July 8th, I shared a story with you guys about a school that had proposed a new school dress code that would prohibit children from wearing most natural hairstyles claiming that they are distracting, unprofessional and faddish. After much opposition, that school quickly revised the dress code. But, Deborah Brown Community School seemed to be harboring similar feelings and had no intentions of making changes until a 7 year old child was forced to switch schools due to her locs.
It hurt my heart so deeply when I watched the video of this 7 year old girl crying because she had to switch schools due to her hair. Tiana’s father, a barber, stated that he takes pride in his children’s appearance and would never allow his child to leave his home not looking “presentable”. He even attempted to compromise with the school by discussing different styles that Tiana could wear in her hair to make it “less distracting”. But, after not being able to find the middle ground he decided that his daughter was not wanted at the school and it would be best to find another school for her.
While it was in the dress code since 2007 that dreds were considered an inappropriate, Tiana’s father states that she has wore her locs to school in the previous year and met no opposition. Deborah Brown Community School has decided that they will now allow students to wear faddish hairstyles, such as afros and locs, as long as they do not present a hygiene issue.  But, Tiana’s parents said that this does not change the fact that their daughter came home crying after her school made her believe that something was wrong with her.
When Tiana was asked how she felt, she choked back tears and stated “I think that they should let me have my dreds”.
Many people at the board meeting to make this change in dress code felt a great relief at this dress code change. A board member stated that there were more important things to tackle than hairstyles and too much energy had been invested in prohibiting this style in the past 10 days.
I have expressed before how important I think it is for our children to learn to love themselves exactly as they are and I am very happy that Tiana’s parents did not succumb to the school’s rules of discrimination. But, I do wonder how many other parents were faced with this dilemma and dimply changed their child’s hair as a way of saying that “this is life”. I do understand that we have to teach children that we are sometimes not able to do what we want, but we also have to know the difference. I could understand if Tiana was coming to school with neon purple and blue locs or something that was actually distracting. But, natural hairstyle such as afros and locs being banned as unprofessional is definitely not a lesson that we want to teach our children.
What is your opinion of the ban of these hairstyles as faddish?
How do you feel about children and natural hairstyles?
Would you have handled this differently?



Monday, July 1, 2013

Day 11 of 365


Day 11 of 365
Day 11: the worst advice you’ve ever heard, or ever been given
O.M.G. This has to be the easiest of all the questions of the 365 days.
The absolute worse advice that I have ever heard was on Love & Hip Hop, I know, I shouldn’t be surprised but still.
Emily was talking to one of those girls about being in a relationship with Fabulous and having to deal with being felt unwanted and his infidelity.
Then her "friend": said to her, something to the tune of:
“Well you knew what you were siging up for when you started dating him, this just comes with the territory."
If one of my friends ever ever ever ever evvverrr said something like that to me, they would find themselves sitting on the same corner as the person cheating on me as I dropped them both out my life. This sounds like the same woman that would ask what you did to make your spouse hit you instead of helping me escape the fists.
I’ll pass!