Tuesday, November 26, 2013

And I Repeat...




There are certain things that must be repeated over and over again until a person fully understands it.

As a child we do things that we know are going to get us in trouble and our parents give us the same lecture every time until one day, we remember that lecture and stop.

It seems we are facing this same struggle with post racism America.

We must keep telling America that our does not sprout out of our scalps and plunge for our shoulders, it also doesn’t make big yet tame curls like the “natural” women in movies, and we must keep reminding them that we have absolutely no reason to be sorry for that. We have absolutely no reason to teach our children to hate it. We have absolutely no reason to force our children to relax, flat iron, hot comb, weave down or hide their hair for somebody’s else’s comfort.

But, we still have little children of color that just want to wear their natural hair to school and they are still getting punished for it. In a nutshell, they are still being punished for not being white. They are still being punished for not being scared to be different. They are still being punished for being proud.

Vanessa VanDyke is probably one of the bravest naturals that I have ever met. At the age of 12 she has decided that liking who she is is more important than other people liking who she is. She proudly wears her big afro to school and even states that she knows that she is different and would get picked on for it but she doesn’t care. After her school threatened to expel her due to her full tresses, she still decided that being true to herself was more important than the bullying that had spread from the students to the administrative staff.

I have said it before, but, obviously it is something that we must keep saying. We must keep teaching our children to love themselves as they come because this world would love nothing more than to chew them up and spit out little robots properly made to hate themselves to ever achieve their full potential.

Natural or not, we must continue to install a greater sense of self in our children. We must teach them that we can not only become the next Derrick Rose, Beyonce, Jay – Z, Tyra Banks or Larry Fitzgerald. But they can also be the next Shonda Rhimes, Eric Jerome Dickey, Oprah Winfrey or Barack Obama.

I believe that one of the main reasons that Vanessa is able to bravely stand up for what she believes in is because she has a mother that is also willing to stand beside her rather than brushing her off. It seems she is being taught that herself worth is not tied into her looks or her hair and that she does not need to change either to have the rights to an education.

Read more about this story below!

http://www.local10.com/news/africanamerican-girl-faces-expulsion-over-natural-hair/-/1717324/23165492/-/eo6hiz/-/index.html

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Curl Definition vs. Volume

Definition vs. Volume
I recently read an article that reminded me of a conversation that I once had with some natural friends. The subject in a nutshell was: Definition vs. Volume. Now, I have always been more a volume kind of chick myself but I find myself usually having the same conversation with new naturals: How do I get more curl definition?
The article poised the thought that our desire for perfect little ringlets is a result of conditioned thinking of what our natural hair should look like. Although I would love some Trace Ellis Ross curls showering over my face, I realize that my hair just doesn’t do that. I wonder sometimes if growing up with natural hair makes you more realistic about natural hair expectations than making the change after growing up with relaxed hair.
Transitioning from a lifetime of getting relaxers for as long as you can remember and not knowing what more than a couple months’ worth of new growth looks like can definitely make us ill prepared. Especially since most of the natural hair products and bigger natural hair icons have little spiral curls cascading all about. Even I sometimes catch curl envy.
But, how can we truly grow through our natural journey if we spend the whole time trying to get unnatural curls? Becoming a definition junkie will hinder our hair journey entirely. We become so obsessed with buying new products and smothering our hair in gels and curl creams to get a look that we are still not born with. Now, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t explore. When I’m in a super curly mood, I throw in some small three strand twists and unleash the spiral curls but most of the time, I’m just rocking my semi curly puffy fro.
Long story short; don’t get caught up in all the hype. The point of the natural hair journey is to love yourself and your hair exactly as it grows. Maybe that’s with flowy curls or semi curly puffy fro, but that is the fun in all of this, your hair is uniquely yours!



Are you all about the curls or a sucker for volume?

Wicked Wednesday: Halloween Edition

Wicked Wednesday: Halloween Edition

Halloween is fastly approaching; like tomorrow. I only figured out my costume on Monday, lol. Are you feeling like your costume ideas are limited by your natural hair? Never fear, that has never been further from the truth! Here are a few ideas for your use or to spark your imagination. Enjoy!

Have a short cut? Why not try Onyx?

Rock a bantu knot out and be Valerie from the Pussycat Dolls and Archie comics.
Be a real life Superhero and rock your fro like Angela Davis
Throw in the classsic ponytails and be Susie from The Rugrats
Got locs, be Canadian Marvel superheroine Heather Hudson
Or just puff it out as Misty Knight

Don’t forget to share your favorite natural hair looks with us by sending them to spokenheart_mf@aol.com with the subject of wicked Wednesdays!

Upcoming Natural Hair Events

Natural Hair Meetups/Events in Novemeber

Looking for a fun way to meet other naturals in your area? Or to just learn more about enhancing your natural journey? Here are a list of natural hair events during the first week of November! Enjoy and feel free to share any experiences you have!
Start Date: November 1, 2013
End Date: November 1, 2013
Time: 7:00 PM to 10:00 PM
Location :
Ruthe Jackson Center, 3113 S Carrier Pkwy., Grand Prairie, TX 75052
Start Date: November 1, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 8:00 PM to 12:30 AM
Location :
2261 Dorchester Ave., Dorchester, MA 02124
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 8:00 AM to 7:00 PM
Location :
Hurst Conference Center, 1601 Campus Dr., Hurst, TX 76054
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 2:00 PM to 4:00 PM
Location :
Lee County Library, 219 North Madison Street, Tupelo, MS 38804
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM
Location :
Days Inn - Lake Norman, 19901 Holiday Ln., Cornelius, NC 28031
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 1:00 PM to 5:00 PM
Location :
Pearl Studios, 519 Eighth Avenue, New York, NY 10018
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 3:00 PM to 6:00 PM
Location :
Fruit of the Spirit Hair Care Studio & Clinic, 4604 Pembroke Lake Circle, Virginia Beach, VA 23455
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 10:00 AM to 12:00 PM
Location :
Silver Spring Civic Building, 1 Veterans Place, Silver Spring, MD 20910
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 12:00 PM to 7:30 PM
Location :
Good Hair Shop, 7113 Covington Highway, Lithonia, GA 30058
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 6:00 PM to 9:00 PM
Location :
Vixens Hair Studio, 2215 W Lehigh Ave., Philadelphia, PA 19132
Start Date: November 2, 2013
End Date: November 2, 2013
Time: 4:00 PM to 5:30 PM
Location :
Elim Community Hall, Mersham Rd., Thornton Heath, CR7 8NP Croydon, United Kingdom
Start Date: November 3, 2013
End Date: November 3, 2013
Time: 1:00 PM to 6:00 PM
Location :
Detroit Historical Museum, 5401 Woodward Ave., Detroit, MI 48202
Start Date: November 3, 2013
End Date: November 3, 2013
Time: 3:00 PM to 6:00 PM
Start Date: November 3, 2013
End Date: November 3, 2013
Time: 11:00 AM to 7:00 PM
Start Date: November 3, 2013
End Date: November 3, 2013
Time: 3:00 PM to 6:00 PM
Start Date: November 4, 2013
End Date: November 6, 2013
Time: -
Location :
Worldwide
Start Date: November 7, 2013
End Date: November 7, 2013
Time: 7:00 PM to 11:00 PM
Location :
Epiphany Lounge, 2361 Adam Clayton Powell Junior Boulevard, New York, NY 10027
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 2:00 PM to 6:00 PM
Location :
2000 East Wendover Ave, Greensboro, NC
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 1:00 PM to 3:00 PM
Location :
Hamptom Walmart Supercenter, 1631 1900 Cunningham Dr., Hampton, VA 23666
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 1:00 PM to 4:00 PM
Location :
Fairfield Inn & Suites, 7720 Corinne Dr, Hammond, IN 46323
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 2:00 PM to 5:00 PM
Location :
50 Ann Mary St., Pawtucket, RI 02860
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 10:00 AM to 7:00 PM
Location :
SMIT Building, 1951 Pisgah Rd., Florence, SC 29501
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 2:00 PM to 6:00 PM
Location :
Indy CoZ Grand Ballroom 7960 Castleway Drive Indianapolis, IN 46250
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 8:00 PM to 11:00 PM
Location :
117 1/2 N. Highland Ave., PIttsburgh, PA 15206
Start Date: November 9, 2013
End Date: November 9, 2013
Time: 11:00 AM to 2:00 PM
Location :
Paladar Latin Kitchen, 801 Silks Run, #1580, Hallandale Beach, FL 33009

Monday, September 30, 2013

Too far....

That Ish Cray!!!
So, I just read this article about a woman who was visiting a salon in another state and she couldn’t wait for her appointment with her chosen salon, so she found another local salon and went in for a blow out. After much whispering amongst the stylists, she was offered a deep treatment prior to the blow out. She accepted and upon mixing some things up in the kitchen, the stylist returned. After much tingling and odd smells, the woman decided that she was having an allergic reaction to the deep treatment and asked it to be washed out. This led to breakage, loss of curl pattern and eventually hair just flat out falling out. They initially told her that her curl pattern would return and it was simply weighed down due to the treatment.
After this did not occur, she came back and raised hell!
Long story short: the salon eventually confessed that they sometimes add “kiddie perm” to deep treatments for “nappy” hair and customer continue to come back thinking that they found the remedy to the almighty shrinkage issues, not knowing that they are secretly being relaxed because it is typically not strong enough to make a difference.

Click here for entire story...
I probably would’ve checked myself into a mental hospital immediately, either due to baker acting myself or just swearing that I had to be hearing things if that woman had put a relaxer in my head.
It is a sad day when even hair stylists are discriminating against hair types. I mean you do hair for a living, if you not comfortable with the hair then just say it, but don’t rape people’s hair with relaxers.
Wow! This was just one of the craziest things that I read all day.
How would you feel/react if you found out that your hair stylist was secretly relaxing your hair?

Monday, September 23, 2013

Autumn Hair Care




















Autumn Hair Care
So, summer has ended and your curls are fried, autumn is rolling in and it time to recover.

Here are a few tips to help that recovery process easier!

1)  Clarifying Shampoo: after a summer full of products and sun burnt hair it is a good idea to get a fresh start. Clarifying shampoo will allow you to rid your hair of all build up without stripping your hair of its natural oils. Although, it is always a good idea to follow up with a good deep conditioning afterwards, or a great leave in to restore some moisture balance.

2)  Leave In Conditioner: A good leave in conditioner is crucial for all seasons, but as we move from a hot sweaty summer to a dry cold winter, it is especially important that we maintain moisture in our hair. This can be done using a great product or on your own. If it is done using a product then it is best to use a product with water/aqua listed as one of the first ingredients.

a.  You can also do this on your own by using a number of natural items. You can use raw shea butter, coconut oil, olive oil and/or glycerin to lock moisture in hair. They also assist in prevents breakage and shedding by penetrating the hair shaft and providing moisture throughout.

3)  Protective Styling: Buns, sew ins, wigs, extensions, anything that will hide your hair and give it a break would be a great idea to recover from the sun damage. Since our ends are our oldest and therefore, the most abused, any protective style that will hide your ends would be a good idea. Plus, your warmer fabrics could cause more damage to your ends by rubbing against them on a constant basis and prevent length retention.


4)   Protein Treatments: If you are like me, then you spent a lot of time trying to get the perfect tan to hold you out through the winter, lol. You probably also like to add lots of fun color to your hair, so a good protein treatment is always great to strengthen your hair strands and keep it from feeling like a stack of hay :s You should try to do a good protein treatment at least once a month!

5)  End clipping: as stated earlier, your ends take a lot of crap over time and the summer is pretty harsh with all that constant sun on them. It is a good idea to get your ends clipped as necessary during the fall to remove damage that was caused during summer fun.

6)  The recurring theme of this article, if you haven’t noticed, is moisture, moisture, moisture. So, it should be of no surprise that this tip is also about properly moisturizing. The wash n’ go that you rocked all summer may not cut it as we move into the colder weather. We also need a good moisture method and what better than the L.O.C. method created by Chicoro. Liquid, Oil then Cream is the definition of the loc method. So apply a liquid, then an oil then loc it in with a cream or butter. Simple enough, right?

7)  Heavier oils and creams: it may be necessary to start bringing the castor oil, avocado and shea back out as we move into cooler weather. The lighter oils that worked during the summer may not be as effective or long lasting as the heavier oils that will coat your hair better during these drier months.

8)  Satin scarf or bonnet: I know, we always use our bonnets/scarves/pillowcases and this is an obvious, right? Well. Honestly I don’t, but my goal for autumn/winter is too be more diligent in this process with the goal of, you guessed it, maintaining moisture. Not a scarf person, get a satin pillowcase so that your sheets and pillow cases won’t steal all your oils and moisture and transfer it to your face, it’s a win-win. You can also wear your scarf or bonnet under a beanie as the weather gets colder, but you cannot wear the bonnet like a beanie!

9)  Detangle: my last tip would be to find a great detangler. Dry hair tends to hold on to more tangles. So finding a good detangler will allow the moisture to travel throughout your hair and help you manage it easier.

Those are my tips to maintain those lovely curls as we move to colder weather!

What are your changing hair regimens for the seasonal shift?



Friday, September 20, 2013

Christine's Big Chop

Christine’s Big Chop

Today we will be sharing the big chop of Christine a.k.a. Chicklet. Previously known for her unique lacefront collection, she is now setting new trends with her exclusive haircuts. I am so excited to share her natural journey with you guys. Enjoy!

What motivated you to go natural?

I was motivated by how badly my medicine was damaging my hair.

Before you went natural, you use to have a large variety of hairstyles that you wore. Were you afraid that you would lose options with natural hair?

Oh definitely, I was not planning on wearing my natural hair due to the fact that I was the lace front queen. I was beyond scared!

Do you still feel like you are limited?

Oh no! I found out through your help and my barber, Giddy, I actually have more choices than ever and more variety going forward as my hair grows.



You kept saying you were going to go back to your lace fronts when you were getting your hair cut, do you miss them now?

Lol, yea I did say that because I thought I would not like it when it was cut. But, slowly I began to like. It was a huge change for me!

Do you feel like you have changed as a result of letting your hair go?

In a good way, I changed my wardrobe and all, but, I’m still the same Chicklet with natural hair


What is your favorite haircut that you have gotten so far?

My favorites are the ones my barber does with designs and I use colored eye liner pencils to add a pop of color to the designs.

Do you have any hair goals?

Yea, to get through this middle stage and grow it so I can do some color, and Mohawks, it has become fun!


Do you have any favorite products yet? If so, what are they, and why?

Ummm...no favorite products yes, it’s still short. But, I use Taliah Waajid to make it curly and it works well for the middle area and love the argan oil.

Lastly, what is your advice to any nervous women that are thinking about doing the big chop?

Just take strong liquor shot and do it! I’m happy I did it; I never knew the unlimited options I had. It’s the best decision I ever made for my hair! 


Would you like to share your natural hair journey? Contact me on "Adventures With Dandelions" facebook page or send it to spokenheart_mf@aol.com!